My new room!

Today I moved into my new room! This is how it looked like before

There was no furniture in it, no electricity. It was just a small room under the stairs. I found a lot of sea-themed decorations in the cupboard.

And decided to decorate my new room with it. Dad and I decorated the room! I love these moments with him! I wish I could spend more time with him!

Today Mitja (my cousin) and I cleaned it. I never thought I could enjoy cleaning this much. We swiped the floor and washed the door. Cleaning can be so much fun! Tomorrow we are going to clean the windows of my new room.

Now my room is awesome! I'm going to spend the night there today! As you can see I moved all of my stuff to the room. My diary, my The Faith of the World notebook, both my Bibles (dad found the Bible in Russian for me! It feels so nice when people support your ideas.), books... Everything is now in my new room!

This evening Mitja and I decided to have a little party. We brought a lot of food!

Mitja's face says it all...

Montenegro is beautiful! I went swimming today and the water is great! I'll publish them tomorrow. If you ever get a chance to visit Montenegro don't miss it. It's such a beautiful country. Switzerland is nothing compared to it! 

I'm having a great time so far. But some people piss me off!!! One evening we went to a restaurant and I couldn't bear it anymore so I ran away... It was the worst experience of my life. I was about to pass out. They found me at one o'clock at night. I hope that never happens again because if it does I am going to die...

I don't want to complain anymore.

Got to go to sleep... Wait! I'm going to sleep in my new room!!! Good night! 

 

Do I really deserve this?

Sometimes I wonder, what have I done to deserve this? I'm not a bad person so why is this happening to me? I thought good things are supposed to happen to good people. Is this just a mistake? Or is it karma for everything I have done wrong in my past life?

I'm lost and I can't control my actions anymore.

My heart is beating twice the amount it should. I can barely say a word. I'm silent most of the time. I want to be alone. I hate it when others talk to me. There's pain in my chest. What is going on?

I want to be the person I've ever wanted to be. I want to bring others happiness, but I can't even make myself smile. 

Is this the end?

Should I give up?