Top 5 Books to Read

1Q84 Haruki Murakami 

To be honest, I could’ve never imagined that I would finish this 900 page novel. I remember I was at the book store with a friend and picked up 1Q84 because it was the biggest book on the shelf. Jokingly, I said that I would never be able to even get half way through it and wouldn’t expect anyone to finish it all. But, as soon as I read the first sentence, I knew that I would not be able to put it down. Why? Because Murakami is a genius. I don’t know how he does that, but the book is written in such a way that you are drawn in by its first words and can’t stop yourself from turning the pages until you reach the last sentence. The language is in no way flowery or beautiful, but its straight-forward realism gives you such a vivid description of the setting and the characters that, by the end of the book, you feel like you know them personally.

Summary: 1Q84 follows the lives of Aomame, a fitness instructor, who kills unfaithful and violent men in revenge, and Tengo, who works as a mathematics teacher at a local cram school, while writing fiction in his free time. Although very different, their destinies are intertwined in the surreal world they both end up in.

The novel doesn’t have the typical “introduction-climax-resolution” structure, but is rather like a jigsaw puzzle, in which you can’t see the complete picture, until the last piece is put into place. In other words, as you read the story, it seems like a 900-page piece of description with barely any action, until you get to the last chapter and realise that everything has reached a conclusion.

Would I recommend the book? Definitely! 1Q84 (surprisingly) doesn’t force any kind of message on you. It doesn’t have the “moral of the story” and doesn’t leave you thinking. At least, that’s what I felt after I finished it. However, it did teach me a couple of things about writing and how you can structure a piece of writing in an alternative way. (It also taught me how depressing being an adult is.)

Side note: this was the only Murakami book I’ve read, so I can’t compare it to his other work. According to many internet reviews, this isn’t his best work, but, hey, I enjoyed it.

Read here

Raspberries at the library

But first, a couple of words about physics revision *clears throat*

I tried so hard 

And got so far 

But in the end 

It doesn't even matter

Literally, the exams I'm studying for right now are not that important (even if everyone says they are) so all the revision I'm doing now will not matter in the end.
Anyway...
I want to write another book. I've been working on the book I finished really hard so now there's like an empty space in my heart *wipes tear*. I really want to write, but I don't really have a plot or anything to describe. I guess I could write fanfiction, but let's not go there........
I brought raspberries to the library today which made physics slightly better.
I decided to walk through the market on my way to the library and this really pretty woman came up to me to do some sort of survey. She asked me for my age and I guess I was too young to participate in the survey. But, yeah, she had really pretty black hair. Not beautiful, but kind of average nice black hair which I found somewhat attractive.
On my way home from badminton, a very young boy (perhaps, seven or eight) was sitting next to me. I heard his mum call him Sebastian. So, anyway, he was playing with a Bratz doll who had purple streaks in her hair. The boy sat the doll next to him and caressed her hair which seemed to have amazed him.
Why am I even writing these things down? Oh well, I'm off to bed. 

Too much physics to handle

Something is seriously wrong with my sleeping schedule. I walk around like some kind of zombie during the day and fall asleep at any occasion given. I googled ways to stake awake and apparently long walks and music are supposed to help. So I walked to the library instead of taking the tram and listened to what one would call "emo shit". 

On the way back though, there was some kind of accident with public transport so all buses and trams stopped working. When everyone gets out on the streets, you really do realise how densely populated the city I live in is. I'd love for it to always be like this because usually it resembles an empty ghost town from a zombie apocalypse movie.

I guess that's all I have to say for now. I might write another book sometime soon though. In English this time. And fictional. There are so many things I want to do though, but EXAMS. I'd love to draw more as well. My absolute dream right now is to go to a coffee room when it's raining, listen to my "emo shit" and draw smutty fan art. Yeah, don't ask. 

It's been a year

It's hard to imagine that the opening ceremony of the Sochi Olympic Games took place about this day exactly a year ago! So much has changed since!

There was no war in Ukraine and no one quite knew what and where Crimea is. Both Russia and Ukraine were seen so differently in the eyes of the world back then...

So much has changed in my life as well. I remember we had P.E. a couple of days before/after the Olympics started and I was sick so I didn't go. Dasha went to the dentist's and came late so she also stayed in the classroom with me. Charlie was also there and the three of us drew all over the board and laughed about Lenin or something... I think I still have a picture of those drawings somewhere. 

My god!!! AHHHH!!!! I found the picture! What the actual f@#k hahahaha

Anyways...

On the day of the opening ceremony, my maths teacher told me off for wearing a hat that said "Russia" on it to class. I found that incredibly funny.  

I wonder where I will be on this exact day next year. Who will I consider my close friends? How different will my life be?

That was deep...

I need people!

Sometimes I think that I'm becoming an extrovert. Kind of. I sometimes have this urge to be around people and talk and laugh and be social. I guess it's an age thing and not really the process of becoming extroverted. I think I still "gain energy" from being alone, like an introvert, but being around people has suddenly become more appealing than ever before. (Did that sentence make sense?)

The thing I fear the most is that this year is a lot like 7th grade. I have this urge to talk to people, but I have no one to talk to. I do have a few good friends who are always there for me, but I'm lonely. 

I'm lost.

I don't want to spend lunches alone in the library, read fat philosophy books and make notes about the mysterious human nature like I did in 7th grade. I don't want to create any sort of fantasy world and ignore reality and the people around me, overwhelmed with strange deep thoughts that I can not share with anyone. I want to meet new people, learn from them and, simply, have a different exciting life outside school.

Is anyone as desperate as me to hang out with people and just... talk?

I guess there are some people at my school who I'm interested in, but I can't approach them due to various things. Or maybe that's what I think and nothing really serious has happened between us.

After all, I'm being selfish. And weak. I can continue on my own.